The funny thing about anxiety is you have your good days and your bad days. Today was one of those bad days. Anxiety never really goes away for me it just seems to flare up now and again. This started last night.
So last night I was reading some stuff on the internets when I started to have a full fledged anxiety attack. I immediately felt the anxiety wash over me in a wave. I then felt like I was having trouble breathing like I wasn't getting enough air. That was my brain telling me it was time to pack it up for the day. Lately I have been putting in a lot of work hours and I have not been getting the exercise that I need to maintain my chemistry. Basically its my own fault!
It continued this morning on the way to work where I felt the heavy chest thing again. Luckily once I got to the office it started to go away. I have been able to convert my office into a pseudo safe place. I know my stress meter is running pretty high right now because my heart is beating faster than usual. My body's reaction to stress is on that I start to get physical symptoms when I push it too far.
I am going to try and get some quality sleep in tonight and hopefully wake up in a better place tomorrow. I need to get my workout on something fierce tomorrow and try and get myself straightened out. I tend to do this to myself all the time by feeling really good and then slowing down my workout schedule. I am constantly going in these circles of problems vs no problems. If only I could make myself be more consistent.
The teaching moment from all of this is it is important to use the tools to calm yourself down. I was able to make myself chill enough last night to get to sleep at a decent time and I was able to change my thought patterns when I got to work. These are things I could not have done a year ago so easily. I would take not feeling this way at all over getting over it quickly for sure but you have to look at the silver lining. You have to grasp on to the successes and forget about the failures.
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